Domestic Violence
Dear All Experts,
I needed badly an Expert Advice against my husband's Domestic Violence. Iam an Oriya Brahmin Girl.I got married in Dec 2014 to Telugu Brahmin Boy basically from Hyderabad. We met in Matrimoney Website ,my Husband is working in Bangalore. Firstly he came to visit me and my place and proposed me with a Ring and my parents liked him. That time he told me in their Family only his widow mother and a brother is there. Mother was getting pension and sometimes when she requires money he helped her and his brother was studying in IIT for which he was financing. Later he told me that he also have three step brothers out of which one Big brother is mentally retired and kept in Mental Asylm and two other brothers are now not talking to their family.
I clearly said at first visit that we will not pay a single penny as Dowry to which he agrees. My Family visited my husbands house in hyderabad during that time we got to know that his widow mother is staying with her two sisters and her brother. Sisters are married and each have 2 kids. His mother didn't welcomed my family in a good manner even didn't spoke well but my parents avoid such acts saying that once the Boy is good we don't care about his family. Our marriage date was decided in May 2014 but due to money crisis from my husband's side they postponed our marriage in Dec 2014. They were also forcing us to do marriage in Hyderabad so that their money will be saved as my husband has to do all expenses of marriage. But we denied and did all processing in my native place.
My problem is
1. After marriage we hardly had sex about 5 or 6 times as my husband had joined the new job after marriage so he has lots of pressure. Also he is forcing me to do Anal Sex to which I denied and now he is threatening that if I don't do Anal Sex he will not do Sex with me.
2. He never took me out anywhere in bangalore alone not even planned for our Honey moon saying that all his savings are finished due to marriage.
3. Due to all such problems I joined job in Bangalore from the day of marriage till date he has not spent a single penny on me and always saying that you are doing job why expecting my money. You have no rights on my earnings.
4. I became pregnant he was not ready for this so he told me to do abort the child but I don't want to as this our First child. At that time my parents also tried to make him understand to which he felt that my parents are interfering in our married life.
5. He is a Short temper and very aggressive guy and he don't realize what he is telling in Anger. He use to fight with me in every 4 to 5 days and abusing me with bad words giving me threats of Divorce. Also scolding my job as I use to come late from office. Didn't even care that Iam pregnant and his bad words hurt me a lot. I use to cry whole night. Once we have fight he deny sleeping with me and taking food outside.
6. Before marriage we planned to have cook but after marriage when I asked him he said he is not trusting people so he called his mother and asked her to stay with us. His mother called her sister and their two daughters and they planned for trip to Mysore, chennai and Kanchi for which all expenses was given by my husband. With my 6 months of pregnancy my husband was forcing me to come in the trip to which I denied. For that also he fought and abusing me many times even infront of her mother. Lastly my parents has to involve in this and he abused my parents also.
7. He fought with my mother and said many bad words to her even he don't want to speak to my father. He is giving money to his mother and never told me about his savings and investments. Whenever I ask him for anything he said I don't have money all my savings are spent in marriage. This statement is repeated after 7 months of our marriage.
8. He is insulting me and my parents infront of me and saying that they don't have rights to stay in his House. When I told is it not my house he said you are not paying rent of this all this furniture was bought by me you don't have rights on it.
9. He also scolds me for our baby as he has no plans for it. Iam now in my parents house and he clearly told me that he is not going to spent a single penny on my medical checkups and for my delivery all the expenses has to do by me or by my parents. Also he told me that he will take me back after 1 month of delivery and after visiting their place to Hyderabad then we will go to Bangalore. I cannot travel with a small baby of one month as we have to take utmost care of his hygiene and I don't want to risk the life of my baby. But now I don't have courage to fight with him and cry more.
10. He is spending his money on his mother and their sisters but not caring for me. Now I left my job due to pregnancy and I don't have regular Income even I cannot do job during the time of Breast feeding Iam scared that he will also not spend money for my baby.
Please suggest me what should I do should I file complain against him and his family for the mental torture or should I not go with him to Bangalore again.