- You should respond to the divorce petition with a restitution of conjugal rights plea.
- You, through your counsel, must unequivocally plead, that despite all the misgivings and unfortunate incidents, you still see life in this marriage, that a Hindu marriage is a sacrament and that you have every intention to make it work.
- You obviously require services of a diligent counsel (advocate)
- I extend my legal services to you. However, I need an exhaustive consultation session with you first. I need to examine and make sure whether you aren't living in an exploitative, abusive marriage and whether your marriage has chance of surviving. Then only I can advice you to the best and defend you accordingly in the litigation. You need to visit me for exhaustive consultation.
- I'm based in Mumbai/ Navi Mumbai just as you are. So it shouldn't be much difficult for you to visit me.
- ९८२०८९७८८४. (Nine eight two zero eight nine seven eight eight four)
Husband wants divorce on basis of incompatibility and cruelty, wife does not want to give
Hi, this is my second marriage and i entered it with a lot of baggage. My husband is a fairly decent man, other than some issues like ego, lying tendency, and very different cultural backgrounds. My first marriage ended because of mental torture and dowry harassment. I carried some negative feelings from it and had a lot of trust issues. I did not realise how damaged my mental state was till i ruined my second marriage. I am not saying everything was my fault. But because in this case my husband is the one who wants to leave and I don't, i am able to focus only on my faults and have forgiven him for everything. (we are both stubborn and very unkind when we fight, and we fight a lot) I am refusing to give him a divorce, & for a contested divorce, he has no grounds other than incompatibility & cruelty, which he can prove, because when we were living abroad, some unfortunate series of events and fights between us led to him getting arrested. I did everything i could to help him out of the situation. The issue was resolved, but it was very expensive and a lot of mental trauma. After everything, we even reconciled. Understandably his family is very angry with me and they hate me. I don't blame them. But now that we have come back to India, I am not living with him (because his family is upset and they don’t want to see me) and they have used this time of separation to convince him to leave me. when I asked him whose decision it was, he said it was his, then he said his family decided, so i am not sure whose decision it was. but i have spoken to him only once in the last few months after i called him and his family members around 50 times he answered my call and told me it was a joint decision by everyone, his family has asked him to choose between them and me and he has chosen them. Now, i realise the mistakes i have made and i am ready to correct myself. I am even ready to go for marriage counselling, but his family is very adamant and does not want to listen to anything. He says he is ready to go on with life without getting a divorce, but his family will want a divorce so that he can move on and get married again. If he applies for divorce, i will contest it. How will the mediation go? will the judge or mediator try to reconcile, and what is the success rate in such cases, where spouse demanding divorce is very adamant and the other party wants to work out the problems. Other than our egos and stubborn natures, there is only one problem and that is the fact that he got arrested because of a fight we had. It was a very bad fight and I made a mistake telling the police the truth about what happened (because i did not know that what he did to me was a criminal offence in that country, no he did not physically hurt me). It will be used to say that i almost ruined his life and it can happen again. Yes, every time we had a big fight we always thought it would be easy to leave each other. But now that it has reality to me, I want to work it out.
Asked 4 years ago in Family Law
Religion: Hindu
9 Answers
If your husband files for divorce file detailed reply denying allegations made in divorce petition
2) parties would be referred for counselling . You can take the plea that you want reconciliation not divorce
3) contested divorce proceedings take over 5 years to be disposed of
4) if husband is unable to prove allegations petition would be dismissed
Hello,
- If your husband files for divorce on grounds of cruelty and you are contesting it, there will be a mediation through the court. It would either be another judge who is not hearing your case or it could be a counselor who is assigned the job. If the petitioner, spouse is adamant on his/her stand about pursuing the case no amount of persistence will help and the mediator will be compelled to send back a report of failure of the mediation to the court concerned.
- Once the case is back in the court it will progress to evidence where the petitioner has to prove his case with unassailable proofs. Now, the incident of him getting arrested does not have to necessarily be held against you. It can be interpreted the other way around and it can be stated that despite such instances where you were unsafe with him, you still want to forget the past and sustain the marriage.
- What is required to be done to salvage the situation is to arrange for a quit conversation with your husband to convince him to start all over again. In any case life cannot go on without conflicts. But you can give it a try.
1. What is the specific question please?
2. He is an adult person and it may not be a fact that he depends on his family members to decide whether he will seek divorce from you or not. He is probably passing on the responsibility of his decision to his family members.
3. it will be prudent on your part to leave things as it is at present.
4. If he files any divorce suit, contest it fittingly.
5. If one party does not want to reconcile, the reconciliation will fail and the matter will go back to the Judge for hearing.
You can contest his divorce case and fight it out tooth and nail.
If you do not want to give him divorce, then you can say no to the mediators asking you to agree for his decision.
In fact the mediators will always try to save the marriage by reconciling the differences between you both and if it that becomes not possible then they may refer the case back to the regular court leaving it to the court to decide after you both strongly fight each other before court on merits on both the sides.
The contested divorce may drag on for few years, by them there are chances for reconciliation or the change in situation may even change the mind to withdraw the divorce case and he may decide to continue the marriage.
Anything may happen.
It may be otherwise also.
Hence you don't lose hopes because of the prevailing circumstances, you may fight till the end without giving up.
If the contested divorce case is decided against you then you can think about further course of action i.e., either to prefer an appeal or ignore the matter cursing your fate.
Dear Ma'am,
I can understand your situation and it appears to be a wise decision to save the marriage.
1. As of now, you can continue your attempts to save the marriage. Write emails, messages etc. which can be helpful to show your good conduct. Record the calls whenever you are talking to him. Talk friendly and lovingly in all those messages/calls. It should appear that you are genuinely wanting to save the marriage.
2. NEVER admit that you did anything wrong (even if you have) in a recorded conversation.
3. If he files a contested divorce, you can defend yourself. The incident of arrest can be defended by taking a defence of condonation of cruelty.
4. More serious attempts can be made at the time of mediation. There is no hard and fast rule. Serious attempts would be made by the mediator to re-concile the differences, however, the success of mediation depends only on parties and their lawyers.
5. You can also file a petition for restitution of conjugal rights. It is basically a decree of the court to the other spouse to resume cohabitation and perform his/her marital obligations. You may contact any lawyer through this forum to discuss about exploring that option in detail
Hope this answer helps.
Best wishes.
There is always an opportunity for mediation in divorce petitions. So there are very high chances that you may be able to resolve the issue in the presence of judge/mediator.
Both the parties are heard patiently and given enough time to discuss the issues in details which helps in bringing the core issues to the fore and resolve them.
1. Incompatibility is not a ground for divorce under Hindu Marriage Act, but cruelty is.
2. In a divorce petition filed on ground of cruelty the allegations are not to be proved strictly unlike in a criminal trial. The test is of preponderance of probabilities. Solitary evidence of petitioner, unless successfully impeached in cross examination, is ordinarily sufficient to pass a decree of divorce in his favour.
3. Court is bound to hold mediation before the framing of issues and the case goes to trial. If mediation fails, court will decide the divorce petition on merits.
Dear Madam,
You may put Restitution of Conjugal Rights case as a formal gesture to indicate to your husband that you are not going to give him any divorce. You can contest the divorce case if he files and you will win the case as he has no grounds.
