1) wife can claim although flat is in joint names she has paid Rs 21 lakhs for purchase of flat as is evident from Rs 21 lakhs transferred in your bank account
2) she can seek injunction restraining you from selling the flat as it is her matrimonial home
3)you cna contest the divorce proce3edings
3) contested divorce cases take 5 years to be disposed of
4) you cnanot blame the advocate as he has merely acted on your wife / father in law instructions
5) stop giving money for your children expenses as your wife is not permitting you to meet your children
6) file application for joint custody of children
7) court would award you vsitation rights
8) stop paying your wife maintenance as she is working . let her obtain court orders for maintenance